Well, not really, but in the technology sense, the IT department sense, I am. Some of the people in my company think I control the Internet!
I don’t say it, but I’d love to say this to new users:
“I am God as far as you & your computer are concerned. When you have computer trouble, you can pray to me, and I might fix your problem. When I come down from my office/mountain wrapped in fire & glory, issuing forth commandments (or policy), you will obey – or else be banished to computer Hell.”
Because, frankly, that’s how it works. People have problems and they pray that I’ll fix them. Not in the literal sense, but when you have to bug me with petty problems, and I’m busy (I’m always busy), then you’d better be asking nicely or else your computer may never get fixed.
